Friday, May 31, 2013

make crazy memories with your kids

One of my favorite birthdays I remember as a kid was when my great aunt from California, my mom, and I were at Byerly's (an upscale grocery store) and for lunch we each got one item from the pastry case. (I'm sure my great aunt greatly influenced that decision!) It was my most favorite birthday lunch ever... so good!



And yes, I had a relatively upset tummy a few hours later... and I still remember how I remedied it. I ate a cucumber! Not cutting it up or anything, just washed it and ate it like an apple!

Sometimes the best memories come when you throw aside the "rule" book and just treat yourself to something special! :-)

Happy Friday everyone!

Wednesday, May 15, 2013

boundaries

Picture yourself at a beach on a lake. Orange cones and ropes surround a square area of the lake marked as the swimming area. You walk through the sand and head into the water. You decide to see if those orange cones have a purpose. You wade through the water out to the back boundary. Well, I think the land goes out farther than this boundary. I'll just move the cone a little farther out and it won't matter. You move the rope out past where it was. Your feet immediately fall off the edge and you swim back to safety.

Walk with me down another path.... Imagine you're on the beach of a beautiful ocean ready to go swimming. You walk into the ocean, swim for a few minutes before something jelly wraps around your leg. Stinging follows.

You've just been bit by jellyfish.

Ouch. Kinda wish I had told you that was a bad place to swim, huh?

When Brayden grows older, I will make sure he knows where he can and can't swim, not because I am a ruthless tyrant, but because I want him to stay safe. It's the same as if a steak knife drops on the floor. Brayden sees it and crawls as fast as he can to it. I beat him to it and he begins to bawl. All-out tears stream down his face. He is very frustrated that I didn't give him what he wanted. In that moment, he thinks I'm a ruthless tyrant who takes away everything he wants... but I promise, I really just want to keep him safe.

Humans need boundaries... and yes, that includes you and me as adults. We need to know what is safe and what is a successful path for our life. We don't like walking where we can't touch the ground. We don't like getting stung by jellyfish, and we don't like getting hurt by steak knifes. On the other hand, we want our way and think our way is the best... even if our way will get us hurt. That's because of our selfish nature. Babies, toddlers, and children are the best example of this. They represent humans at our truest form.

Adults hide this selfish nature under many different names; of late, the biggest name has been equality.

I'm ashamed to admit it, but the state I live in just made gay marriage legal. It makes me sick to my stomach to even admit it.

I am not biased. I am not judgmental. I don't want to wish bad financial situations on anyone or keep anyone from realizing their dreams, but I know that humans need boundaries. We cannot change moral code to fit our various whims. Marriage has been between a man and woman since the beginning of time (God made it that way... and yes, He is smarter than us). Who are we to think that we are so advanced that we should change something that had been this way forever?

Now, you may have perfectly good reasoning that you've strung together which has created your support for gay rights. But ponder this: we've removed that boundary... what is next? I've heard rumors of people campaigning that polygamy will be next because if it's all about love and those multiple people love that one people, it should be legal... even scarier than that, Erik has heard facts about East coast states removing gender lines between boys and girls... if a student has the body of a boy but feels like a girl, that student can use the girls' restroom, be on girls' sports teams, and act like a girl. Teachers must allow it and parents don't have to be told. The student can switch back to being a boy the next day.

I understand the "innocent" desire to help kids who are confused about their sexuality. But what confused them in the first place? Was it the fact that women and men now have blurred lines as to their role within the family? Culture has deemed "weird people" and "those who don't fit in" as ones who have to question their sexuality as opposed to going with the way their body was made, even if they have different instincts.

We can't live life by feelings; we have to have a standard of living.

If I lived my life solely by my feelings and by what I wanted, I would most likely only eat chocolate and sugary goodness and bake chocolate chip cookies every night. The reason I don't? I know that despite what I feel, I need to abide by certain boundaries of health that keep me safe.

I was thinking about those kids last night who are being taught to question their sexuality by allowing them to switch genders... what a difficult life they have ahead of them because they have been given no boundaries. They are stuck to figure out their sexuality on their own... so difficulty as a kid!

Yes, there are exceptions; yes, there are people who have tendencies toward x, y, z... but we cannot create a culture to indulge those feelings because we are then creating a boundary-less, unsafe place for us to grow.

By the way... what about those teenage guys who realize they can claim to be a girl, head into the girls' restroom because they are "questioning" their sexuality, and all they do is indulge in harming girls or "watching" porn in front of their eyes? No one is allowed to stop them because they have to follow their feelings. Makes me sick to my stomach. We've taken the boundaries away, and kids can get away with things that adults know is wrong, but we've pulled away the boundaries and adult help that would save those kids from a world of hurt. We're letting them swim with jellyfish.

You may think, "Well, that's just in the East coast...." "Polygamy legalized? That will never happen...." Come up with the excuse you want, but I guarantee that people 20-50 years ago would have never dreamed we would have legalized gay marriage.

Boundaries. Redefining marriage erases a boundary. You may consider that good for the sake of equality, but I promise you, it's not.


I want to say I'm sorry for my bluntness or come up with arguments to refute yours, but I'm not sorry and I won't go into them all here. Many conservatives agree with me, whether they have a platform to say it or not. This is an age where we can state our opinions via social media, and I have chosen to. You, whoever you are, are in my prayers.