Tuesday, July 26, 2011

"patiently" waiting for baby

So I thoroughly have a new appreciation for military families who say goodbye to their spouse/parent/sibling, etc. for months to a full year or more so they can serve our country. I admit that I've been glib enough to tell some people I know coming up on a waiting period, "It'll be over before you know it." Yes, time flies in the grand scheme of things... but when it comes down to 24 hours passing over and over and over again to create a string of days and then weeks without someone in your life, it's extremely difficult.

Yes, the big picture is it will go fast, but I've learned now to think twice before telling someone in a waiting period (even people on bedrest like me) that it will go fast. The reality is that no matter how "long" or "short" their waiting period is, that person still has to walk through hour after hour after day after day of some integral person being out of their lives.

I remember after both Brian and Brody passed away that I wished time would just vanish in some way and that it would be magically six months after my brother/baby had passed and that time would magically healed my wounds. I could see and imagine the day that the grieving wouldn't hurt as intense, but that didn't change the fact that I was still living out the moments and days and weeks immediately following a tragic death. It wasn't easy.

The same goes for military wives, bedrest, and any other type of waiting period for someone you love (whether waiting for heaven or just a return home). Those days are long and can sometimes be slow.

I am trying to make the most of my time down. I want to enjoy my rest time - the times when I'm alone and the times when friends and family visit and help me through it. I want to enjoy my time with Erik and enjoy my time without a baby crying at night. :-) I've made up goals and activities to getting certain stuff done during this time--like cleaning out the junk in our house and keeping it clean (as best as I can on bedrest) one little bit of junk at a time and doing crossword puzzles and reading books or playing games.

In fact, Erik and I now play cribbage. It's a nice way to relax on the sofa and enjoy each other's company. It took four games of him having amazing cards and me learning how to play before I actually won a game!

So that's all for now. Slowly but surely I'm making it through each day. I know the day will soon be here when I will be posting baby pictures and updates, but until then, I'll simply process my waiting period as patiently as possible.

P.S. I know that the waiting process is the growing period as well. Just as baby is growing inside me now, I want to grow as a person and in my character during this time as well. Lord, please help me do that! Thank you! You are wonderful! :-)

P.S.S. Thank you to all the military families for what they've done for our country! Words can't properly express my gratefulness!

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